My great grandfather beat my grandfather, my grandfather beat my father and my father beat me. I guess you could say it has been the family chain of pain. I swore to myself that I would never have children for fear of repeating this god awful family tradition. I am engaged and my fiance is a second grade teacher. All she talks about is having children. I have never shared my family secret or my fears with her. My question is this, do you think that it is possible for me to become a father and not do what was done to me by my own father, in other words can I break this chain?
Yes!! It is more than possible. You are not your great grandfather, your grandfather or your father. You have however been on the receiving end of a very “long chain of pain.” You are a conscious creator who through living such enormous contrast (something other than what you wanted for yourself) you have created some very clear desires for yourself. You have attracted a wonderful opportunity into your life to be a father and this could become a corrective emotional experience for you. What this means is, by having your own child and responding to him or her in the ways that you actually would have wanted your own father to respond to you; you are now allowing yourself to be emotionally nurtured and repaired by this loving exchange; one that you are on the giving and receiving end of. This is the surest way to re-parent yourself as you parent your child. This entire loving experience will set you free. Now you will have broken the family tradition and created an entirely new one based on love, love, love.