Highlights
I have always felt as if I am living a double life. Where I came from is not anywhere that anyone that I know could ever imagine or understand. I have successfully escaped the nightmare that I call ‘my childhood’, so I thought. The identity that I have created for myself is reflected in my success as a business man living in a upper class world. I am having a very difficult time sharing my life with an intimate partner and use the success in my business as my excuse. I am afraid that if I allow myself to become emotionally vulnerable with a women that she will see right through me to the small emotionally and physically neglected and abused child that I once was. How can I merge my two lives in such a way that I can share myself and my successes?
It sounds very painful for you when you consider your life as a small child and it is amazing how you have never allowed that experience to dictate who you have allowed yourself to become. Please do not start now. You have subconsciously tapped into the art of re-framing all along and have been telling yourself the other version of the story of your childhood. This is the only way you could have arrived to where you are now. You have a super power, the amazing ability to re-frame. Lets just help you bring that superpower into your conscious mind so that you can consciously tap into it and create the intimate part of your life with a partner. Re-framing is the experience of consciously rethinking our past in such a way that it can only support our life in our now. You may rethink your childhood as an experience that was colored with contrast that has given you the clarity which has allowed you to know the life that you would like to create for yourself. This has worked for you in regards to your professional identity and can also work for you regarding your personal identity. You recreate an understanding about what has happened that can only feel good when you reflect back upon it if you choose to reflect back at all. I do not believe that we ever need to look back in order to move forward. The contrast of what was has launched a clear and focused desire for what you are seeking now and every part of the process can feel good. You can do this and you do not have to merge what was into what is, it can simply be what was, a moment that has gotten forever lost in what is. Your life is now and you are amazing in every way. Relax into the knowing that who we are is always up to us and not dictated by where we have come from.
Apr 24, 2012 | Categories: Consciousness, Dating, Family Relationships, Help I Am Stuck, Highlights, Love and Relationships, Psychologically Speaking, Spiritually Speaking, Vibrationally Speaking | Tags: Allowing, communication, Connection, Ego, Energy, Loving, Parenting, Trusting, truth | Leave A Comment »
My wife is a devout follower of Abraham Hicks and you of course. She takes complete responsibility for her own happiness and never comments on my perpetual state of unhappiness. I feel bad about myself when I consider the lack of contribution that I make to her internal happy state of being. My greatest fear is that some day she will, as you might say “vibrate out of my life all together”. Do these things really happen?
Well, we do vibrate into and out of our experiences and relationships all day long. The more important question here is, what keeps you in this relationship? Maybe your real fear is that you will tire of being with someone that does take responsibility for her own happiness. Maybe you are having a difficult time finding your place in your marriage. I can tell you one thing about your wife, she is in your marriage because she chooses to be. It is possible that she can feel something wonderful within you that you are not choosing to see or feel within your self. It happens all the time; people that are connected and happy with themselves only choose to see the brightest and the best in others. It sounds like you are the other.
Apr 18, 2012 | Categories: Consciousness, Family Relationships, Help I Am Stuck, Highlights, Hypothetically Speaking, Love and Relationships, Psychologically Speaking, Vibrationally Speaking | Tags: Allowing, communication, Connection, Ego, Energy, Self-love, Trusting, truth | Leave A Comment »
If a women loses her virginity, does it mean that she no longer deserves to be respected?
I have always thought about virginity as something that you give away happily and willingly. We must honor and cherish ourselves; both of which fall into the category of deeply respecting ourselves. It is a beautiful thing when we can come together with another from our deepest connection with ourselves first and share a most intimate part of ourselves as we sexually express ourselves through loving physical contact with another.
Apr 17, 2012 | Categories: Consciousness, Family Relationships, Highlights, Hypothetically Speaking, Love and Relationships, Psychologically Speaking, Sex and More Sex, Spiritually Speaking, Vibrationally Speaking | Tags: communication, Connection, Loving, Self-love, Sex, Trusting, truth | Leave A Comment »
When I was growing up the mantra in our house was “be happy with what you have”. I have always been happy and always wanted more of everything for myself and my family. My parents saw me as an ungrateful only child and discouraged my desire to want more. As an adult I have become successful in the financial world and feel tremendous pride in my ability to support myself in a very nice lifestyle. I continually reach out to my parents extending myself and my resources to them and they want nothing to do with me. It is very confusing and hurtful that they continue to rebuff me. What could I have possibly done to offend them? I love them both so much and just want them to have everything that they have ever wanted. Help!!!!
I can certainly understand your confusion and feelings of hurt by your parents rebuffing of you. I do not believe that you have done anything to offend them and you have every right to be proud of what you have created for yourself. Your desire to share yourself and your resources with your parents comes from such a loving and generous place. You are not responsible for your parents reaction to you and without them telling you directly you may never know the real reason. What you are responsible for, is remaining true to how you feel about them. In doing so you cannot allow those feelings to remain contingent on their approval or disapproval of you and what you are doing or not doing. Focus upon yourself and the unconditional love that you feel for them because that is who you are and who you have always been. Let them know that you love them dearly and you will never give up wanting them to be a part of your life and you will always want them to have everything that they have ever wanted for themselves.
Apr 16, 2012 | Categories: Consciousness, Family Relationships, Highlights, Psychologically Speaking, Uncategorized, Vibrationally Speaking | Tags: communication, Connection, Loving, Parenting, Self-love, Trusting, truth | Leave A Comment »
Why do I lose myself when I fall in love?
Falling in love is such a beautiful thing and it is also a chemical thing. The research shows that when a person falls in love, 12 areas of the brain work together to release euphoria-inducing chemicals such as dopamine, oxytocin, adrenaline and vasopression.We can easily become emotionally swept up in the promise of merging ourselves and our lives with another. This is not losing ourselves it is perhaps temporarily losing sight of our selves which is quite different. The thing is that when we are able to remain connected to ourselves as we merge our selves (from our point of connection) with another, it feels more like a co creation and less like surrender. This is a wonderful way to share ourselves with another without it ever feeling like a loss.
Apr 13, 2012 | Categories: Consciousness, Dating, Highlights, Hypothetically Speaking, Love and Relationships, Psychologically Speaking, Sex and More Sex, Spiritually Speaking, Uncategorized, Vibrationally Speaking | Tags: Allowing, communication, Connection, Ego, Energy, Loving, Self-love, Sex, Trusting, truth | Leave A Comment »
I am very concerned about my college roommate who also happens to be my BFF. She spends all of her free time in some kind of fantasy land. We are not talking about your run of the mill daydream here, this is outright fantasy. The things that she thinks about is beyond anything that could ever happen for girls like us. I guess that is why it is called fantasy land. But let’s get real here. We are about to graduate and what is waiting for us out there is no party. She is in deep and really needs to snap out of it. Please advise.
Your roommate and BFF is very lucky to have you looking out for her best interests. When we allow ourselves to engage in the unrestricted use of our imagination or what you are referring to as fantasy, we are actually planning for future events by launching our desires. It is my belief that when we fantasize about anything, we are in an active state of manifestation. Simply stated the physical manifestation or experience of anything is the result from the thoughts that we have been thinking about and what we have been focusing upon. By doing this we place ourselves in harmony with our desires. When you understand this to be true you can begin to see how certain opportunities and experiences have entered your own life as a clear and accurate reflection of your thoughts. My advise to you would be to focus upon yourself with the clear knowing that what we think about is what we attract into our own experience and the deeper your BFF is in the better the outcome will be for her.
Apr 10, 2012 | Categories: Consciousness, Highlights, Hypothetically Speaking, Psychologically Speaking, Uncategorized, Vibrationally Speaking | Tags: Allowing, communication, Connection, Luckiest, Trusting, truth | Leave A Comment »
