Losing Myself

I am really on top of my game when it comes to taking care of myself, as long as I am not in any kind of intimate relationship. As soon as I get involved with someone that I care about I seem to lose myself and focus all of my attention on the other person and the relationship. I become someone that I do not even know, well yes I do, I become the dreaded dependent and uncertain version of myself. What can I do to break this unwanted pattern?

I believe that this is a fairly common phenomena for people. That being said I would really like you to examine what it feels like for you when you think about being in an intimate relationship. Explore your own individual and very personal thoughts regarding this subject. Not how it has been in the past, but how you believe it could be for yourself. We tend to fall into repeating patterns of behavior when we are not consciously making choices for ourselves , but instead acting out something that is familiar to us. It could be as simple as the way you watched your own parents interact. The important thing here is for you to begin to develop for yourself your own individual and very personal ideas about who you are while in an intimate loving relationship with another. Creating a vision of that version of you before becoming involved with another will assist you tremendously in remaining connected to yourself as you reach out and co create something magical with another. It is never about what we are doing that is important, and it is always about how we are feeling about what we are doing that is what really allows us to come into alignment with and gain a sense of clarity around our ongoing ever changing visions of ourselves.